Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Simpson's Movie Poster? Eat My Shorts!

I know if I don't get a Simpson's the Movie Poster I'll just..,

I think the whole idea of finally identifying which Springfield is the Simpson's Springfield sort of backfired. Ever since I found out that Springfield, Vermont was elected as the official Simpson's Springfield I've lost interest in the long running cartoon series. I've lost interest in just about everything else too. Food, Sex, the Joy of Work, nothing seems the same anymore. I guess you could say I've been in a funk.

I mean what did we do wrong? Springfield, Illinois is a good little city isn't it?

I had always assumed that Springfield, Illinois must be the home of Bart, but I guess I was always wrong. From the very earliest days of the show I had watched. Even before the show obtained its own time slot on Fox I had watched.

Someone at work had dutifully told me that the cartoonist was actually talking about Springfield, Illinois. He seemed to know what he was talking about I thought. And that's how it all began I believe. All in a moment so many years ago I was convinced that it must be my home town where the Simpson family lived.

Over the years I kept looking for the clues, the similarities between my home town, and Bart's. I found many. Look, there's another clue I tell myself, and others! For many years I believed that we were special. It isn't your typical city which has its own cartoon, especially one as hip, as cool as The Simpsons.

I Just Know I've Seen These People Here In Springfield, Illinois!

Years later I began to recognize an often repeated phrase in reference to the Simpson's and it went something like this, "The show is set in Springfield, but exactly which Springfield hasn't been revealed". That when I began to wonder.

Could it be that my Springfield, Illinois wasn't the Simpson's Springfield? Could it be that all those people who told me that Springfield, Illinois just had to be the Simpson's Springfield were totally wrong?

Possibly so, I thought.

There's No Doubt This Is The Simpson Family At The Washington Park Lagoon

Still I chose to believe. What the heck, who was there to say anything different. Even the creators of the Simpson's weren't talking. It was a neat way to handle the distress of having been sold out.

For years and years the comfort of my faith made life livable. Bart and Lisa went to a school that looked just like one in Springfield, Illinois. Homer was obviously driving to, and from the nuclear power plants in Clinton, Illinois. The Davey Crocket styled founder of Simpson's Springfield were based upon Springfield, Illinois pioneer founders, and what about those occasional references to Abraham Lincoln! Not to mention Shelbyville!

And then there came Simpson's The Movie!

Springfield's Beloved Nuclear Power Plant In Nearby Clinton, Illinois

For some insane reason, publicity I guess, the powers that be decided that it would be fun to pit one Springfield against another. That there should be an online vote, and that winner would take all. And through some weird fluke a small hole in the wall town, Springfield, Vermont managed to steal Springfield, Illinois unofficial claim on being the true Simpson's Springfield.

Springfield, Illinois came in second place in the online voting. I suspect, and still do that foul play was involved. It is too late now, and there is nothing it seems that anyone can, or will do to place the crown back upon the true king - Springfield, Illinois.

There's nothing it seems anyone can do to stop this travesty, this mockery of all that is good and right, to restore the way things really should be.

We Know The Simpson's Live In Springfield, Illinois We've Seem Them!

I guess in some bizzaro world alternate reality Springfield, Vermont or any of the lessor Springfields out there were experiencing the same feelings that we in Springfield, Illinois had been. They actually believed that their Springfields was the Simpson's Springfield. But they were wrong. For I know different.

And now due to some insane mistake Springfield, Vermont has been "Chosen" as the Simpson's Home Town. And I can barely sleep at night thinking about it.

But there is a consolation prize!

We are being offered trinkets. Just as the native Americans were offered beads and bobbles to pick up and leave their rightful lands we Springfieldians have been given a box of movie posters, and a handful of free movie tickets as a consolation prize.

Who needs it?

We Know Who Jebediah Really Is And He Didn't Found Springfield, Vermont

While I'd surely love a Simpson's the Movie movie poster, and a chance to see the Simpson's Movie for free I'd feel uncomfortable taking either if it means I must accept living in a Universe in which the Simpson's Springfield isn't secretly about Springfield, Illinois.

And so I must say in my strongest voice possible, and it ain't so easy to muster folks as it was before, "Eat my shorts"! Eat my shorts all of you who live in Springfield, Vermont!


Rajah said...

As a further consolation, consider that "Father Knows Best" was set in Springfield and, of course, it must be Springfield, Illinois since we epitomize all the values of the Anderson family much more than the Simpson family. Springfield, VT. can eat my fedora.

VTvid said...

You should read how the local organizers for the Springfield, Vt premiere event mistreated us volunteer actors and extras after we helped so much in turning out the winning video.
See http://vtvid.110mb.com/3.html

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